A shopping list (and Life)

Cat litter (make sure you get
the allergen free kind, since
Fluffy sneezes when the
other kind sends up those
horrible dust clouds, and
get at one with the orange
tabby cat on the front,
because I think she has a
crush on him, and we don’t
want anymore accidents on
the new carpet. I can still
smell the last one, even
though we’ve cleaned it
three times.)
Milk (but it has to be organic
because of all the hormones,
and I don’t care whether it’s
two percent or whole, but
skim might as well be flavored
water, so also skip the nonfat
cartons.  If you can find a
whole gallon, get that, but if not
get two halves, but make sure
they are dated for sometime
in the future.  Remember last
time when one carton was
good and the other went bad,
but we’d opened them in the
wrong order?)
Cereal (Michael likes the ones
with marshmallows, but all that
sugar and food coloring can’t be
good for him, and he’s only three,
so I don’t want to start any bad habits
so early in his life.  So maybe find
a box of healthy stuff, but that has
a fun character on the box, and
if he hates it I will eat it instead.
Just make sure whole wheat is
listed first – I saw on the news
how so many products have
Whole Wheat! listed on the front
but the ingredients list Enriched Flour
first, which means that’s what it has
the most of, so make sure you check
the ingredient list, because the
FDA checks those, so we know
it’s true.)
Chicken (make sure you buy
small breasts because if they’re
too big, they won’t cook all
the way through without burning
or drying out, and I can’t stand dry
chicken.  And get the organic, farm-
raised kind, with the blue label,
that’s the kind Jenny buys, and her
husband grills it and she says it’s
scrumptious – that’s what she said –
because you can tell by the taste that
it’s not chicken that was raised in a
factory. You know what, nevermind.
I’ll go get the chicken myself
because if you don’t wrap the
plastic bag around it just right,
it’ll leak and contaminate
everything else.)

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